Know gender no fear

How can we embrace the idea of ‘the feminine’ and keep it from being feared or hidden away? Or how could we dissolve divisive ideas such as ‘the feminine’ and ‘the masculine’?

Imagine ‘the feminine’ being embraced; ‘You’re girly’ would no longer serve as a threatening weapon in the schoolyard. Imagine a history curriculum in which women’s experiences and lives emerged from their hiding place and were equally taught and valued.

The gender stereotypes around us

Avoiding the ‘feminine’ influences behaviours, dress codes and career choices. That’s why it’s probably easier to convince girls to choose careers in STEM than it is to convince boys to choose careers in the care sector. That’s why it’s still a norm that ‘boys don’t cry’, even though everyone knows that crying has no gender (also, the endorphins released when crying make us feel good, while avoiding crying builds up stress, which does not make anyone strong).

In 2025, it’s still the norm for boys to be stoic and ‘man up’. For a boy who doesn’t conform to those stereotypes, punishment may lurk in the corridor in the forms of physical and verbal bullying. Boys have a narrower path to walk, while girls, as they grow up, seem to conform less to gender stereotypes. However, a girl may still be severely punished on certain points. For example, if she tries to ‘act like the boys’ by living out her intimate desires. Mean gossip may rain over her in the school halls and social media and can be difficult to counteract. It can also be hard to find parents who want their daughter or their son be the first to move across the borders of these gender norms.

So, although schools are meant to be places of curiosity, innovation and novelty, they are seldom inclusive to norm-breakers, nor do they foster first movers. If we want real inclusion in our schools, we need to scrutinise all gender stereotypes and challenge them with ambition.

The challenge of challenging stereotypes

Challenging stereotypes isn’t an easy job, especially if you’re a teacher trying to do it on your own. You might risk of being accused of imposing a private activist agenda. It’s much easier with policy behind you.

However, when a pilot project on challenging gender stereotypes was launched in France in 2013, groups of parents accused the schools of having an agenda of breaking down the differences between men and women and promoting homosexuality. One strategy to counter these false accusations was to meet the parents on common ground with values such as respect and equality, values parents want their kids to have and be met with.

Another common ground that people can meet on is ‘freedom’. Freedom is a core value in democratic societies. But what is freedom if children and young people cannot be who they are, or be with the ones they like, or if they cannot freely choose a career path because of the strains of gender stereotypes? Society, schools and teachers have an obligation to act.

What can schools and teachers do?

Here are 10 points of action inspired by the many experts on gender I have invited during my time as a featured group moderator:

1. Language awareness: Practise using inclusive, gender-neutral language
   • Make pupils aware of gendered expressions, and avoid divisive expressions like ‘boys and girls’ (use ‘children/pupils/class’)
2. Scrutinise the literature curriculum: Ensure all pupils read books with female protagonists, so all pupils get familiar with girls and women’s lives and perspectives
   • It’s a myth that boys will only read if they read about themselves − find inspiration
3. Scrutinise the history curriculum: Ask how history should be taught if everybody’s history is equally valued
   • Teach history in more inclusive forms, balancing political, social and cultural histories
   • History teacher Susanna Boyd has invented Integrated History, which is inclusive rather than just adding women as an optional appendix − read more
4. Playgrounds and public spaces: Observe the use of public spaces with pupils
   • Does one group of children always dominate a majority of the space?
   • Does anything need to be disrupted? Have days without ball games, take turns using the space. Invest in a table football with female players (these actually exist!) − read more
5. Mixité and similarity: Help pupils with mixed-gender activities
   • Boys may want to play with girls but abstain out of fear of how they will be judged
   • Teaching similarities between genders and differences within a gender can encourage more mixed-gender friendships
   • Children who feel secure with children of other genders than themselves like school more
6. Have conversations about stereotypes: Don’t impose the ‘right’ ideas
   • Investigate the consequences of gender stereotypes with pupils (remain open to answers you did not expect to hear)
7. Look out for counter-stories and role-models: Contradict stereotypical narratives
   • Collect evidence with the pupils and put it on display in the school
8. Join campaigns with a gender agenda: The annual video competition ‘Buzzons contre le sexisme’ enables pupils to contribute with videos that challenge stereotypes
9. Gender know-how in schools: Teachers need education in the latest gender research and time to investigate stereotypes, as well as our own biases
   • Invite colleagues into lessons to find bias in our language and behaviour toward pupils, and help one another to change
10. Ultimately, support teachers with policy: Give schools policies that support the work of setting pupils free

* ‘Know gender no fear’ was the name of Marie Louise Petersen’s first eTwinning project on gender issues.